Co-Parenting Brings Many Challenges

If you are a parent who just went through a divorce, you may find that the hard work is just beginning. Divorce means you are no longer married; it does not mean you are no longer a parent. Co-parenting can be more challenging than the marriage because it forces you to interact with your ex despite the negative feelings you may have for one another.

Co-parenting can be hard on your kids and hard on you, but you and your ex must attempt get along until your children grow up and can manage their own affairs. Until that time, these tips may help to create a harmonious home for your kids.

• Judge less: Decisions your ex makes are seen from a different viewpoint and he or she believes they are the right decisions for your children.
• Lower your expectations: Your ex will inevitably disappoint you and the better you are at accepting this, the less you will be disappointed by him or her.
• Always do the right thing: Even when no one is looking, comply with the provisions – and the spirit – of your child support and custody agreements.
• Be civil: Do not belittle your ex or undermine his or her relationship with the kids, and avoid fighting in front of them.
• Support your children: Listen to your children’s concerns, be patient with them and reassure them that they are loved.

Most of all, do not involve your children in the legal aspects of the divorce and its aftermath. It is likely that you and your ex will disagree about many issues and you may end up in court because of alimony, child support or visitation disputes. These issues are between the two of you, and your kids should not be drawn into the middle of them.

If you have disputes or questions regarding your divorce decree or child support agreement, seek the counsel of an experienced lawyer. An attorney who is knowledgeable with divorce and other family law matters can help you obtain a result that works for you and your children.